It seems like its just one thing after another for the last 6 months.  In the last 3 I've lost an uncle, my grandmother and my aunt who was also my godmother.  GC and I broke up and as much as I get why, it is still hard to accept.
I have a ton to be thankful for, I know this.  I just wonder when I'm going to stop feeling like I'm passing time waiting for "life" to happen and I'm just tired of feeling "lost".
I would give anything for that delirious feeling of happiness I know I've felt in the past.  Unfortunately that usually only comes around when I'm in Love.  Blech.
For the first time yesterday I wondered if maybe going back home wouldn't be a good idea.  The thought of the holidays that are right around the corner make me sick to my stomach. 
I just wonder when I'm going to be comfortable with myself and by myself.  When I'm going to get comfortable in my own skin and I stop looking to everyone else for approval and acceptance.  When I'll stop judging my own self worth and I can actually find happiness somewhere else than in a boyfriends arms.